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Otherwise, you become a dependent robot who can’t function by itself. But at the same time, we believe that it’s bad to depend on yourself. Because when you’re self-reliant, you can enrich the lives of the people around you much more. And even though I must confess I don’t fully master emotional self-reliance, I have made significant steps that positively changed my life. What you will find next are 6 lessons that can help you to become emotionally self-reliant. It’s always harder to speak your mind and to stand for something. Nothing’s going to change when you let out all your emotions. When you’re needy, you only damage your relationships in the long-term. If you’re not into reading, try learning a language, go to meetups, join a running club. If one thing falls through, don’t worry, do something else with your precious time (just don’t waste it). But when you stop looking for it outside of yourself, you will find that you can truly rely on yourself — and that will help you to love others.
You don’t need to travel to the other side of the world to find yourself. When something bad happens to my health, relationships, or finances, I’m thankful. If you believe that you will live forever or that you will be loved until the end of time—you get lazy. But once you separate yourself from everything in life, you become a passenger who tries to make the most out of every single minute. You will never be able to explain everything with 100% certainty and proof. ” You are where you are in life because of a few random things, plus the decisions you made personally. If you’re unhappy or if you want to change, just change your standards. Most people hide from difficulty and internal turmoil. To truly appreciate something, you have to realize that you will lose it one day. Life is a series of unrelated events and decisions. We say things like, “everything happens for a reason.”But understand: Life just happens. It’s easy as changing your existing thoughts when they are not useful to you. Whatever you do, get comfortable in your own skin, it’s the only one you will ever have. And that brings us back to Emerson again, he said: And that’s life. Nearly four decades before Nietzsche wrote that “no one can build you the bridge on which you, and only you, must cross the river of life,” Emerson admonishes that “imitation is suicide” and counsels: The power which resides in [each person] is new in nature, and none but he knows what that is which he can do, nor does he know until he has tried. has a free Sunday digest of the week's most interesting and inspiring articles across art, science, philosophy, creativity, children's books, and other strands of our search for truth, beauty, and meaning. Subscribe to this free midweek pick-me-up for heart, mind, and spirit below — it is separate from the standard Sunday digest of new pieces: participates in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn commissions by linking to Amazon.[…] Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string. In more human terms, this means that whenever you buy a book on Amazon from a link on here, I receive a small percentage of its price. They teach us to abide by our spontaneous impression with good-humored inflexibility then most when the whole cry of voices is on the other side.Else to-morrow a stranger will say with masterly good sense precisely what we have thought and felt all the time, and we shall be forced to take with shame our own opinion from another. It takes me hundreds of hours a month to research and compose, and thousands of dollars to sustain. If you find any joy and value in what I do, please consider becoming a Sustaining Patron with a recurring monthly donation of your choosing, between a cup of tea and a good lunch. Claim yours: is in its twelfth year and because I write primarily about ideas of a timeless character, I have decided to plunge into my vast archive every Wednesday and choose from the thousands of essays one worth resurfacing and resavoring. In fact, in the past, my answer was yes to all the above questions. In life, we always turn outwardly for everything: Happiness, advice, affection, love, approval. To practice this, for the next few weeks, don’t shy away from verbal confrontation with others. And yet we spend our lives mistrusting that innermost voice and instead deferring our truths to the voice of the outside world, turning to others, in ways subtle and staggering, to tell us who we are and what is real.No one has made more beautiful nor more convincing a case for trusting our inner voice than Ralph Waldo Emerson (May 25, 1803–April 27, 1882) in his 1841 essay “Self-Reliance,” perhaps the best-known piece in his ) — that endlessly rewarding trove of Emerson’s wisdom on the two pillars of friendship, the life of the mind, the key to personal growth, what beauty really means, and how to live with maximum aliveness.